sweetly broken

Sweetly Broken - Jeremy Riddle

To the cross I look, to the cross I cling
Of it's suffering I do drink
Of it's work I do sing
For on it my Savior both bruised and crushed
Showed that God is love
And God is just
Chorus:

At the cross You beckon me
You draw me gently to my knees, and I am
Lost for words, so lost in love,
I’m sweetly broken, wholly surrendered
What a priceless gift, undeserved life
Have I been given
Through Christ crucified
You’ve called me out of death
You’ve called me into life
And I was under Your wrath
Now through the cross I’m reconciled
In awe of the cross I must confess
How wondrous Your redeeming love and
How great is Your faithfulness.

While doing my quiet time two nights ago, I kneeled before the Lord and asked him to speak to me if he chose to. I failed him a million times that day and will continue to fail every day but what I knew was that He would never leave me and will continue to finish the work He has started in me. His spirit gently brings me to my knees surrendering all that I have. As I came to the light, I read this in His word. Ezekiel 36:26 - 29.

"I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit in you; I will remove from you your heart of stone and give you a heart of flesh. And I will put my Spirit in you and move you to follow my decrees and be careful to keep my laws. I will save you from all your uncleanness."

I look back at my life before I re-dedicated my life to Jesus. My heart was a heart of stone. I was apathetic. I didn't care about much. I wandered without a real goal overworking myself, knowing that even money wouldn't bring me happiness. During my church retreat in 07, God spoke through Debi, (a sister that I admire so much.) and broke me causing me to weep whenever I thought of the cross. I couldn't even speak because the spirit was grieving in me. I wanted to scream to the world the love of Christ and our beautiful God. When school started, my cousin Jane who has also been miraculously delivered from drug addictions, told me to start a bible study. That bible study is called Passion Church. He worked miraculously during senior year through passion church, helping us to bond more as a family and to be there for one another. We've seen each other being healed before our eyes. God's amazing. Another time, he gave me an opportunity to have passion church with Yun's sister and mom who were visitng from Korea. Only by the holy spirit, there was conviction within Yun's sister and her mom that after I left, they were blown away what God was trying to do the whole time. Recently, I met up with Yun again and she told me that her father was starting to go to church. He's now in love with Jesus and with God. Amazing how God can transform a heart of stone to a heart of flesh. Yun told me that she hears from her sister what He does at home and how He can't stop talking about Jesus and the bible. Praise God! God's been faithful and will continue to be faithful to us. I can't write into words the love He has shown me and is continuing to show me. All I can say is that I don't deserve any of this but that is the main reason why it's through grace I am saved. With mercy, God is training me to love him in every situation and to lay down my life everyday.

O God, renew my spirit and fill me every day with your unfailing love. Help me to reach the lost. Burden my heart with the brokenness in your heart so that I may go out of my way to please you and bring those you have called back to knowing you and loving you, because there's nothing like it. You are like... totally out of this world. I wished everyone could turn to you and believe in you... I guess that's why you have placed Christians here, so that we can pray on their behalf, and to intercede for people who do not know you.

I remember watching Prince of Egypt a couple months back for the first time after being saved and man, that broke me so much. God is beautiful. My spirit started to grieve again for my brothers and sisters that were in bondage to the world just like the israelites were enslaved by the Egyptians. God calls Moses to bring His people out of slavery to freedom into the promised land. God told me while watching this how I was a slave to sin and now He has brought me out. The Israelites are God's people enslaved. This is why we evangelize, to bring them to repentance before the holy of holies, to help break off the chains of apathy, indifference, suicide, pride, lies, etc...That movie is super annointed even though it's done by Dreamworks. And there is no limit to God. He uses even people who don't know Him to speak... that's crazy.. and these people don't even know it's God using them in His plan.. Anyways. Got to get to work early tommorrow.

Good night world.